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Jan. 25th, 2007 @ 07:15 am Is it better to burn out or to fade away? 
Entropy
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Is it better to burn out or to fade away? 

Perhaps it's better this way, that you didn't have to suffer the life of mediocrity we both secretly knew you were doomed for.  Maybe ending it shorter in a blaze of glorious despair and cliche worse than this sentence is preferrable. More suited..  Unfortunately, it's easy for me to say that, here in my comfortable, messy dorm room paid for by the same underapplied, underdeveloped, overappreciated glimmer of talent dimmed by a world of heightened expectations and disappointing reality.  I'm not your mother, I'm not your sister, I'm not even your father who may or may not have been the epitome of loathsome- you certainly left us in a cacaphony of glossy lies and shimmering false facades.  I wonder if they were for us- for me, really.. or a habit with its own inertia that you knew you could shed.  I hope the latter.

Moving on, I've decided applied behavioral analysis is the class I'm dropping.  Even though I didn't make it to my first Buddhism class, Morty Winst sold it pretty well. And I always like a Kamber class.  And the Love and Sex seminar, well.  Who expected me to drop that? It seems to be turning out to be what half of registrants hope the Psych of Women class is, only to find out it's regurgitated third wave all over again.. to be.

A friend's dad recently told his daughter to listen to everything I say.  I'm sure he was half-kidding, but I'm also sure he was half-honest and -earnest.  I think the ranting and raving debate over suicide bombing vs non-violence, while he repeated over and over how shocked with my.. liberal lambs wool innocence, he also seemed to be impressed with my ability to 'move the ball'.  Anyways.  I tried teaching her about tact and embarassing, exaggerated gratitude being most often superior to reciprocity-based-guilt-and-cowing, but I don't think the lesson stuck.  Too much of an audience for her to really listen.

There's a birthday coming up, and I've realized another reason I'm not a facebook fan.  It makes that too easy.  I get less, well. Credit, to be honest.  I mean, if someone thinks I 'remembered' her birthday just cause a website was reminding me the whole week.  An impressive sign of consideration- and memory?  No.  So I refuse to login.  Of course, to continue my honest being, she won't notice either way, so I should stop masturbating over this.  Keep those balls in the air, ladies.

Oh, also. That book Ms. Korwin had about Psychic for Dummies.. Painful.  Let the loving golden light of the Universe wash over you as you climb the Golden Tether to the Akashic Book of Records?  Gagsome.  And the Women's Guide to Orgasm?  Only a cunt's hair better.  I don't have a snatch, and even I know that any 130+ page book on the subject should include the phrase 'wet, soft corduroy.'  And I'm not sure anal sex really belongs in the 'How kinky is too kinky?' section.  And if it does, it certainly should have more than 7 uninformative pro testamonials followed by 8 uninformative, depressing con testimonials.  Regular or pervasive readers are expecting a shameless plug.  (And they aren't licensed, so I saved even more money. (Ha?  I should get that quote verbatim before expecting anyone to catch it.))

Blaze on.
From:neko_of_the_sea
Date:January 29th, 2007 10:50 pm (UTC)
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better to burn out. also, this kid in my english class knows you. curtis highscool? north shore? (im moving to SI in May/June)
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From:bluntdoctor
Date:January 29th, 2007 11:45 pm (UTC)
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Leaving aside questioning your sanity in willingly moving -to- SI, and my sanity in using so many adverbs..

So who's this kid? I never went to Curtis, but I knew a few cats. Whats his name?
From:neko_of_the_sea
Date:January 30th, 2007 10:34 pm (UTC)
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jeremy something i forgot... he plays bass...
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From:bluntdoctor
Date:January 31st, 2007 09:40 pm (UTC)
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Double J? That kid's fuckin awesome.